WAIT

This word keeps coming to mind many times throughout my days. I know I am going to be molded in many ways and one of the biggest ones is learning how to be patient and faithful in the waiting.
My surgery went very well last Thursday. It was supposed to last about 3 hours but only lasted 1 1/2 hours. My ENT is very efficient apparently! He took out the entire thyroid as well as a lymph node that looked suspicious. Before I went in to surgery the hospital chaplain came in to pray with us. She was about 85 or 90 years old! Just the sweetest thing and very encouraging. As they were wheeling me down she even wiped the tears from my eyes.
I stayed only one night in the hospital which seems very short to me! I was supposed to get a roommate but did not until I was ready to leave on Friday. So that was good motivation to leave! Honestly, I think sharing rooms is dumb! It seems like the obvious thing would be lack of privacy and quiet. I also would have had to walk down the hall to the shower! Is this a college dorm??!! And why would they want 2 sick people to share a bathroom? Anyway....that's over and it was reiterated to me that I love Zeeland hospital which has private rooms! I also discovered that I love the older more experienced nurses. They are much more nurturing and caring about what your needs are.

After getting home I was able to have a few days of complete rest and quiet. Shawn's parents took care of Caleb on Thursday and they took Adrianna for the weekend. My sister Jen took Eliza from Wed.-Sunday, and then my mom had her until Monday. My mom also had Caleb from Friday until Monday. Amber helped out with school pickup and drop off also. It was so nice! I was so glad I didn't' have to worry about the kids. Thank you so much to all who helped with kid care! I really did enjoy my quiet and being able to start the recovery resting like I'm supposed too!
I had to start off with soft foods and I am still keeping to that somewhat. The meals we have been receiving have been AMAZING! I can't even tell you how helpful it is to know I don't have to do grocery shopping or cook. I am supposed to rest for about 2 weeks at least and not lift anything until the incision is healed a bit more. That means no lifting Caleb! Shawn took off this entire week of school which has been so great. He has to use his sick days but he is also covered under the Family Medical Leave Act. I think he could take up to 6 weeks if needed.

I saw the doctor today for my post-op visit. I got the stitches out and so far everything is healing nicely. It is very sore still and I'm still lovin me some pain meds! He told me the cancer was papillary and that it was in the lymph node they removed. I guess there were 2 tumors on the right side of the thyroid and because of that, they took out the entire thing. I asked him if they could tell how long it had been there but he said there is no way of knowing. There is a chance it could come back but I am not going to focus on that right now. The next step is to see the Endocrinologist for a consultation and begin the treatment. I think they first figure out if there are any other cancer cells in my body, where they are, and how much. They they can figure out how much radiation to give me. The radiation is a one time treatment in the form of a pill. When I take it, I have to be away from the kids for at least 2 days and have limited adult contact. This treatment will kill any cells left around the surgical site and any other in my body. After this treatment, I will have to go back to get my thyroid regulated and also see if the treatment was effective. If it is, then I will have to go back every couple of months for the 1st year, then every 3-4 months the 2nd year, every 6 months the 3rd year, and then once a year after that. If it wasn't effective, then I would either have it again or they would take out the lymph nodes. I'm definitely praying they don't have to go back in! I can't even imagine that right now!
So we wait.....we wait for doctor's appt.'s, we wait for results, we wait for treatment.
We wait upon the Lord!

I think I still feel like this is happening to someone else. We have only known for about 3 weeks and because it was so fast, I just went through the motions and did what everyone told me to do. After today's appt., I am realizing the length and depth this journey is starting to be. I hope I can get past the point where it is not all consuming and I can see the world around be through a clear lens and not a cloudy one like it is right now.
I am amazed by the prayers from hundreds of people, and some I don't' even know! My aunt sent me this jar filled with memory verses. I can pick out one each day or 20 each day! I am so thankful for that. I just need to keep surrounding myself with God and His words.
Please keep praying.
Here are some specific requests:
1. That I would stay out of a pit and keep my eyes on Christ. I don't want my "what-if's" to consume me!
2. That the doctors would read the results accurately and know what the treatment should be.
3. That Shawn would just be a patient and loving daddy and know how to care for us.
4. That the kids would not be anxious and if they are scared, they would know how to express it.

We are so thankful for all you dear friends who show love to us daily!